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DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat
metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest
and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted
project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could
get to it.WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere
under the workbench with the speed of light . Also removes
fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time
it takes you to say, ‘Oh sh–!’SKILL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.
PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation
of blood-blisters.BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor
touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board
principle… It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable
motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more
dismal your future becomes.VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt
heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer
intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various
flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the
grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing
race.TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood
projectiles for testing wall integrity.HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground
after you have installed your new brake shoes , trapping the jack
handle firmly under the bumper.BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to
cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into
the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the
outside edge.TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength
of everything you forgot to disconnect.PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under
lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil
on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out
Phillips screw heads.STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to
convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering
your palms.PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or
bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to make hoses too short.
HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is
used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts
adjacent the object we are trying to hit.UTILITY KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of
cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly
well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic
bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic
parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in
use.
Particularly apt as I have had a lot of those tools out most of the day on a very nice project! No engine on this one unfortunately though
I have been using the hammer wrong! I normally use it to belt the spanner attached to that bolt that won’t move!
Particularly apt as I have had a lot of those tools out most of the day on a very nice project! No engine on this one unfortunately though
Eloborate….
I was building a photobooth for a friend’s daughter’s party. It was a mixture of plastic, wood, steel and copper and that meant I got to blow the dust off lots of tools from chopsaws to pipe benders. As usual, I went over the top and ran a mini wireless network with 2 monitors (one inside the booth and one for me and the queueing guests) and an overhead projector in another room cycling through the photos. I took pics of it but it will take a while to get them off the camera as I’m currently sorting and uploading the 500 plus photos that it took over a few hours! It was a great success though and huge fun with all the props we laid out. I could have had 5 more party bookings if I wanted them. They are not a bad business idea as these things can be £600 plus to rent for an evening.
I was building a photobooth for a friend’s daughter’s party. It was a mixture of plastic, wood, steel and copper and that meant I got to blow the dust off lots of tools from chopsaws to pipe benders. As usual, I went over the top and ran a mini wireless network with 2 monitors (one inside the booth and one for me and the queueing guests) and an overhead projector in another room cycling through the photos. I took pics of it but it will take a while to get them off the camera as I’m currently sorting and uploading the 500 plus photos that it took over a few hours! It was a great success though and huge fun with all the props we laid out. I could have had 5 more party bookings if I wanted them. They are not a bad business idea as these things can be £600 plus to rent for an evening.
It sounds fantastic, it sounds like a business plan!
have sooooo been there for most of those! 
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