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A panda walks into a café, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead.
As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, “Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn’t even pay for your sandwich!”
The panda yells back at the manager, “Hey man, I’m a panda! Look it up!”
The manager opens his dictionary and reads the following definition for panda: “A tree dwelling placental mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white colouring. Eats shoots and leaves.”
LOVE IS GIVING SOMEONE THE ABILITY TO DESTROY YOU, THEN TRUSTING THEM NOT TO.
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, But rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, Vodka in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming…….WOO HOO, what a ride!
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