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- This topic has 7 replies, 7 voices, and was last updated 11 years, 9 months ago by Radar.
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- February 27, 2013 at 5:59 pm #14970imperialdataKeymaster
I like this joke so I thought I’d pass it on. I have removed the punchline though, can anyone guess it without googling?
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A man walks up to the bar with an ostrich behind him and as he sits, a small cat jumps up on the stool beside him.The bartender comes over, and asks for their order.
The man says, “I’ll have a beer” and turns to the ostrich.
“What’s yours?”
“I’ll have a beer too” says the ostrich.
The cat says “I’ll have a half beer, but I’m not paying for it.”
The bartender pours the beer and says “That will be £7.18 please”.
The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out exact change for payment.
The next day, the man, ostrich and cat come again, and the man says “I’ll have a lager,” and the ostrich says “I’ll have the same,” and the cat says “I’ll have a half glass of lager but I’m not paying for it.”
Once again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change.
This becomes a routine until, late one evening, the trio enter again.
“The usual?” asks the bartender.
“Well, it’s close to last orders, so I’ll have a large scotch” says the man. “Same for me” says the ostrich. “I’ll have a small scotch but I’m not paying for it” says the cat.
“That will be £9.81” says the bartender.
Once again the man pulls exact change out of his pocket and places it on the bar.
The bartender can’t hold back his curiosity any longer. “Excuse me sir. How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?”
“Well,” says the man, “several years ago I was cleaning the attic and found an old lamp.
When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes.
My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I just put my hand in my pocket, and the right amount of money will always be there.”
That’s brilliant!” says the bartender. “Most people would wish for a million pounds or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”
“That’s right! Whether it’s a pint of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” says the man.
The bartender asks “One other thing, sir, what’s with the ostrich and the cat?”
The man replies “*************************************************“
===================================================================So what’s the reply?
February 27, 2013 at 8:02 pm #65609Swindon AndyParticipantGot to be a bird with long legs, and a tight pussy – what else could it be?
February 27, 2013 at 8:30 pm #65610imperialdataKeymasterOn the ball there Andy! That was his second wish.
Dirty mind you must have….
February 27, 2013 at 8:46 pm #65611HippoDronesParticipanta bird that wanted the same as him?
February 28, 2013 at 2:16 pm #65612craftycarmyParticipantGot to be a bird with long legs, and a tight pussy – what else could it be?
hahaha Lol ya crack me up hehe
They’re from the bird and pussy rights club!
February 28, 2013 at 10:46 pm #65613RadarModeratorGot to be a bird with long legs, and a tight pussy – what else could it be?
Beat me to the punch…
March 2, 2013 at 10:55 am #65614BigBenParticipantHahah!!
March 6, 2013 at 1:50 pm #65615ScouserParticipantCheese on Toast!…(he had Altzeimers don’t you know…)
March 8, 2013 at 7:55 pm #65616RadarModeratorCheese on Toast!…(he had Altzeimers don’t you know…)
LOL
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