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Q: Why did God create blondes?
A: Because sheep can’t bring beer from the fridge.
Q: Why did God create brunettes?
A: Neither could the blondes.Q: Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?
A: She saw “911” on the back and thought it was a Porsche.Q: Why don’t they let Blondes swim in the ocean?
A: Because they can’t get the smell out of the tuna.Q: What happened to the blonde tap dancer?
A: She slipped off and fell down the drain.Q: Why can’t blondes be cattle ranchers?
A: They can’t keep their calves together!Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A: Her ankles.Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
LOVE IS GIVING SOMEONE THE ABILITY TO DESTROY YOU, THEN TRUSTING THEM NOT TO.
GO ON! DONATE! YOU KNOW YA WANNA!
nothing against Essex girls…..
An Essex girl and an Irish guy are in a bar when the Essex girl notices something strange about the wellies the Irish guy is wearing. She says,”Scuse me mate, I aint being f**ny or nuffink, but why doz one of your
wellies ‘ave an L on it and the uva one’s got an R on it?
So the Irish guy smiles,puts down his glass of Guinness and replies,”Well,oim a little bit tick you see. The one with the R on it is for me right foot and the one with the L is for me left foot”
“Cor! exclaims the Essex girl, “So THAT’S why me knickers ‘ave got C&A on them.An Essex girl goes to the council to register for child benefit. “How many children?” asks the council worker “10” replies the Essex girl “10???” says the council worker.. “What are their names?” “Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne,Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne and Wayne” “Doesn’t that get confusing?” “Naah…” says the Essex girl “its great because if they are out playing
in the street I just have to shout WAYNE, YER DINNER’S READY or WAYNE GO TO BED NOW and they all do it…” “What if you want to speak to one individually?” says the perturbed council. “That’s easy,” says the girl… “I just use their surnames”An Essex girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. “I’ll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress.” she says. “Come again?” says the clerk, cupping his ear as he was a bit deaf. “No” she replies. “This time it’s mayonnaise.”
Essex Girl enters a sex shop & asks for a vibrator.The man says “Choose from our range on the wall.”She says “I’ll take the red one.”The man replies “That’s a fire extinguisher.”
An Essex girl is involved in a nasty car crash and is
trapped and bleeding.The paramedics soon arrive on site.Medic: “It’s OK I’m a paramedic and I’m going to ask you some questions?
“Girl: “OK”
Medic: “What’s your name?”
Girl: “Sharon.”
Medic: “OK Sharon, is this your car?”
Sharon: “Yes.”
Medic: “Where are you bleeding from?”
Sharon: “Romford, mate.”An Essex girl was driving down the A13 when her car phone rang. It was her boyfriend, urgently warning her, “Treacle, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on the A13. Please be careful!”
“It’s not just one car!” said the Essex girl, “There’s hundreds of them!”Another Essex girl was involved in a serious crash; there’s blood everywhere. The paramedics arrive and drag the girl out of car till she’s lying flat out on the floor.
Medic: “OK, I’m going to check if you’re concussed.”
Sharon: “Ok.”
Medic: “Ok then how many fingers am I putting up?”
Sharon: “Oh my god I’m paralysed from the waist down!”if you are blonde, or from Essex…no offence intended. If you are a blonde Essex girl, ah well…..at least you have your health!
only joking![:o)]
Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
LOVE IS GIVING SOMEONE THE ABILITY TO DESTROY YOU, THEN TRUSTING THEM NOT TO.
GO ON! DONATE! YOU KNOW YA WANNA!
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